Valley Elementary School Drama Club Presents: The Lobster Quadrille, From Alice in Wonderland

 

ALICE IN WONDERLAND

By Alice Gerstenberg

Based on the writings of Lewis Carroll

Adapted and composed for radio broadcast by Sage Tanguay

For the Valley Elementary School Drama Club, October 2017

The Lobster Quadrille

 

NARRATOR

ALICE

MOCK TURTLE

GRYPHON

ALL (For Song)

 

NARRATOR

We find our Alice (hello) on a damp rocky shore with the Mock Turtle (hello) and the Gryphon (hello). Having just tumbled through the looking glass into the chaotic Wonderland, she tries to get her bearing after just growing to quite a size. As she learns of her company’s curious natures, the Mock Turtle questions her knowledge of the customs of the sea.

 

MOCK TURTLE

Perhaps you were never even introduced to a lobster.

 

ALICE

I once tasted one (others GASP)—no, never!

 

MOCK TURTLE

So you can have no idea what a delightful thing a Lobster Quadrille is.

 

ALICE

No, indeed. What sort of a dance is it?

 

GRYPHON

Why, you first form into a line along the seashore.

MOCK TURTLE

Two lines; seals, turtles, salmon, and so on; then, when you’ve cleared all the jellyfish out of the way—

 

GRYPHON

And that generally takes some time.

 

MOCK TURTLE

You advance twice—

 

GRYPHON

Each with a lobster as a partner.

 

MOCK TURTLE

Of course, advance twice, set to partners.

 

GRYPHON

Change lobsters, and retire in same order.

 

MOCK TURTLE

Then you know, you throw the—

 

GRYPHON

The lobsters!

 

MOCK TURTLE

As far out to sea as you can—

 

GRYPHON

Swim after them!

 

MOCK TURTLE

Turn a somersault in the sea.

 

GRYPHON

Change lobsters again!

 

MOCK TURTLE

Back to land again, and—that’s all the first figure.

 

ALICE

It must be a very pretty dance.

 

MOCK TURTLE

Would you like to see a little of it?

 

ALICE

Very much indeed.

 

MOCK TURTLE

Come, let’s try the first figure. We can do it without lobsters, you know; which shall sing?

 

GRYPHON

Oh, you sing, I’ve forgotten the words.

 

NARRATOR

Creatures solemnly dance round and round Alice, treading on her toes, waving their limbs to mark time while Mock Turtle and other creatures sing.

 

First Verse

“Will you walk a little faster!” said a whiting to a snail,

“There’s a porpoise close behind us, and he’s treading on my tail.

See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance!

They are waiting on the shingle—will you come and join the dance?

Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?

Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, won’t you join the dance?

 

NARRATOR

The creatures dance against Alice, pushing her back and forth between them. She protests and finally escapes; they bump against each other

 

Second Verse

“You can really have no notion how delightful it will be

When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out to sea!”

But the snail replied, “Too far, too far!” and gave a look askance—

Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but he would not join the dance.

Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.

Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not join the dance.

 

ALICE

Thank you; it’s a very interesting dance to watch, and I do so like that curious song about the whiting.

 

NARRATOR

Join us to hear what happens to Alice next time in Wonderland!!!!